summer thought

well, well, well! it seems like ages ago when i last made an entry here. hmmmm, still thinking of what to write.

first of, december rating did not fare well and dragged down the whole 2009 rating. well, consequences and repercussions have been meted out to due to poor performance. just hoping that i could recover this year.

january, did not fare well too. february did good, in slow progression. march did very good, so far. as for april, we started on the right track. i terms of, start of rating as compared to that of january and february. it’s still early to tell but i’m hoping that we can continue good performance that we started last february.

wfm has been introduced to our teams, a decrease in our rating has been noted but still we continue to push our respective field personnels to make ends meet. still we are on the adjsutment period, only a matter of time these guys would get used to it.

summer is here and classes are over. my daughter got the 3rd place on here class, yehey!!!!!!! my son, althought not on the top ten but did show some attitude improvement. guess i have to gave him a little room for his own improvement. he is still 9 years old. my wife had her goiter removed a day before the palm sunday. she was able to report for duty on holy tuesday. the surgery is just in time for our household help went home right after her graduation last tuesday. talk about gave and take, our household started during the preparation for the cebeco affair and ended a week after my wife’s surgery. at least by now, all we have to worry is how to waste the whole summer away. for my wife and kids, to say the least. i still got a job to handle. aaaah life!

as for my hp, deleted some playlist and songs. uploaded some, created some playlist. discovered that a headset for n70 music edition existed. nice one too!

btw, my wife replaced my broken watch that i have been wearing since way back 1991. whew, almost 30 years! nearly shed a tear when i took it off for the last time. temporarily i hope! i say nearly shed a tear, for i like the new watch! it’s cool and it’s hip to me! yeaaaaah! love it! rarely took it off my wrist!

december thoughts

hmm, the last time i made an entry was early december. to start with, me and my wife were chosen as one of the principal sponsors for the monsanto-vinluan nuptials held at the st francis the assisi parish in balamban, cebu last dec 08 ‘09. it’s an important affair for both me and my wife because we were about to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary.

we celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary by attending a mass at sta. lucia parish church in sta. lucia, asturias. we took the kids there and ate at the road side near the public plaza at the asturias proper. some anniversary, but worthy to remember. ten years of trials and triumphs, ups and downs, thick and thin. the best and the worst is yet to come, but we could brace it this time.

the cebeco3 affair was a should say a good affair, with minor system hang-ups it did pushed through. did not join our departments christmas party at talisay city for it coincides with the cebeco3 affair. also the crew did move their christmas party the next day just to gave way for the affair. as usual, the party was okey and a lot of fun. most of the personnels brought in their family to witness the fun.

right now, we are still trying to recover from our slump in our ratings. am still wishing that the balamban cable problem would be rectified. half baked resolution to the fault orders were the order of the day. i just wished that it would be over so that we could move on with our daily tasks. i know, this would lead to repercussions and consequences even if there is a valid reason to it. still it is my responsibility and it is part of my area. just wishing or wish ko lang! we still have a few days left before the month ends, prepare for the worst and hope for the best. a job is a job and i still have a job to do.

as for my hp, just uploaded some songs to the new playlist taken form songs in my hp. just the same old stuff, nothing new.

typhoon

last week’s typhoon was somewhat a trip down memory lane. since last tuesday until last friday, my youngest kid didn’t have classes due to the flooded school driveway of the wblc. water was up to waist deep. we were able to take my daughter last wednesday but only to be notified an hour later that classes have been suspended due to rising water at the driveway. it was just knee high when we came in and past waistline when i came back to fetch my daughter. no one was allowed to go inside the school premises. instead we were told to wait at cebeco3 stock yard. two buses went inside the school grounds to ferry the students, as per instructions by the city administrator. who happens to see the whole situation. my daughter was at the 2nd bus, she didn’t know i was there waiting.

couldn’t help but recall the time when i was at kinder school. a typhoon lashed cebu province then and i was attending at asms in lutopan, toledo city. all the students were told to go home and would ride the buses destined to various drop-off points in toledo. for toledo, there are two buses, one for sangi-beach area and another for luray-ilihan area. i took the sangi-beach bus instead of the usual luray-ilihan bus. i was fetch at around 2pm by my cousin at my classmates house at acmdc sangi-beach compound. my classmate’s name is nimrod nazarito l. quiñones. we lost communication after kinder school when i was transferred to then c.a., now the cctc. we were able to communicate again in high school when his mother joined the teaching force of the uv-tgc. he was studying then at up-cc and joined the pma after high school but left the pma and continued his studies at usc-main. after college, he joined the freeman newspaper and now he is the managing editor of the said newspaper.

well, i’m happy for my friend and what he is now. come to think of it, time fly so fast and very fast indeed! one day, you’re at kinder school getting wet by the typhoon and the next thing you know, you’re worried about your kid also at kinder school being trapped in their school because the school’s driveway was flooded up to waist deep.

no wonder, white colored hairs starts to pop-up at my head. arrggggggg.

right now, i’m listening to manic street preachers on my hp. i just deleted other older playlist and songs on my hp.

under neon loneliness, motorcycle emptiness. under neon loneliness, motorcycle emptiness! sorry couldn’t help it, nice song really.

another thought

a woman’s best friend.

just this mid month of november, i bought my wife something she was longing for. not the high-end but something that she likes. for me, i never thought that i would be buying her what we call a woman’s best friend. since i was a bachelor, i kept on thinking if i would ever one day would be able to buy such a thing. then, out of the blue it did happen. you should have seen the look in her eyes when she wore it. even up to this moment, i was still amazed on that event. it did happen and i did it. come to think of it, life is full of twist and surprises. life’s little wonders.

now back to my hp update, i just loaded a charlatans playlist. a greatest hits compilation of sorts. and also i loaded a playlist called triad, a mixture of artist that i like and put them together. i’m also planning to put up again my jesus and mary chain compilation. just to find my mp3 files of that said artist this time.

talk about my mp3 files, now where did i put it?

ajji’s b-day

just celebrated ajji’s 9th birthday yesterday. damn, time flies so fast and he’s 9 years old. i could still clearly see him shivering in cold when he was shown to me by the nurse at the cebu community hospital, 9 years ago. in a year he’ll be a teenager and he’ll on his own world by then. well, we’re still here to guide him through thick and thin. just hoping and praying that he’ll be a good person, not only to the both of us but the society as well.

what more a father could ask, other than his kids well being and good character.

nagging thought

always wondered if when the so-called laying out of the cable for the cebeco affair would be finished? hope dondon and his team would be present tomorrow, so we can do it once and for all.

been pondering about what transpired during our last emergency meeting at the office. was there something cooking in the air? i dunno, it’s a wait and see situation. while waiting, all i could do is do my job which i am paid to do. ’til that day comes, a job is still a job that needs to be done. as mr george boronat would say, ” i know it’s a lousy job, but somebody has do it!”. sure thing, right on!

and now to my old hp, just downloaded “strays”  by jane’s addiction and haven’t loaded it yet to my hp yet. damn! hate that part but it’s worth it! maybe i’ll also load the cult’s album, just forget the  title. uh huh! i’m getting ooooooold!

just kidding! he, he, he!

just a thought

last sunday 10-25-2009, my daughters school had their school family day along with their uno day and the end of their rosary month celebration. my daughter, dressed in chinese outfit was so very eager to come. me and the rest of the family came along, wherein we participated in the opening ceremony but wasn’t able to finished the affair due to sweltering heat of the sun. we just proceed to the church, in time for the 10am mass.

well, at least my daughter had participated and felt what it’s like. not the whole affair though.

day’s work

Riverfenix - 08 - Ordinary World

just happy this morning, when i was called by edgar inajada(one of my imediate superiors) regarding the toledo power corporation broken pole issue. he instructed me to do what is necessary to close the issue, and i did just that. i called up the toledo power corporation personnel to be contacted and asked him if they could allow all our field crews(both osp and sli) to do their thing inside their compound without being hampered by that half-day safety seminar. can’t help but to snicker on the very thought about that seminar. some things are better left unsaid.

in our conversation, i had a chance to insert on an issue about a pesky landowner in the nearby town regarding his request to contact the osp department-maintainance. i was given the green light and i gave the contact number. any reason why i shouldn’t be smiling. for weeks on end this pesky guy would follow-up in a way that would crumple your day.  i understand as to why this guy gets a little pesky, he has been making his request since august 2009 and it is october 2009. damned those osp crews for prolonging the issue.

as for the osp works, the broken pole has been replaced(this i have to verify!), the foc near our rsm has been re-routed, and the buanoy, balamban cable relocation(copper and foc) has been started(only waiting for the cable crew to do the re-routing). so happy to think about it, but new ones kept on coming. i wonder when will this people stopped making such requests.

for my hp music, i get a little bored with my current music playlist. i’m still thinking on what to upload. maybe, nobody nobody but you! ngek!

poetry03

The Rain - 07 - Perfect Moment (The Rain)

words of welcome

i
all the hardships that i endure,
not knowing what it may come.
yet something tells me to secure,
and continue forever more.

ii
as i recount those very times,
more vividly in my memory.
that echoes more like chimes,
i could just catch my breath.

iii
it pains me to think,
the efforts that i have to do.
yet so quickly in a blink,
all of it vanished without ado.

iv
as i recall those preparations done,
i could just then stare blankly.
yet with all that’s said and done,
all was worth it frankly.

v
the anticipation that i have to hide,
no matter what in any way i do.
still haunts me with pride,
but i am afriad to let it go.

vi
as for the moment of truth comes,
for us to met face to face.
i was choke on my own tears,
now i can see the future differently.

11 - 05 - 2000 / 2305

this poem was written at the cebu community hospital, after my wife and first child was settled in their espective rooms. that is at around 11pm. the poem expresses the very feeling that i felt when first met my two kids right after they were born.

i had a chance to hold my son when we arrived at home, i am the one holding him in my arms. i tried to touch him at the nursery section but the nurse did not allowed me. i was in a sort of way not in a very hygienic state then.

as for my daughter, i was the one to recieve her when she was brought by the nurse into her mother’s room.

on both scenario’s there is only one feeling that i felt. sorry, can’t explain it. words aren’t enough to explain it, the poem itself only scratches the mere surface. 

poetry02

Savage Garden - 03 - Truly Madly Deeply (Savage Garden)

I

On the very day that we met,
I thought that it was just a mere coincidence,
Or so it seems or was it?
It could have been aided by the divine providence.

 
II
Yet it still lingers in my mind,
And that makes me wonder,
Why am i so blind,
Blinded by fear that i didn’t dare.

III
So blinded by fear that i almost quit,
And pretended that i didn’t care,
But i was troubled by it,
For i didn’t gave it much time to spare.

IV

It only made things harder for me,
As things really gets complicated,
And i have to rely on myself but me,
Either i will or will not, have this attended.

V

As if there is something i am afraid to find,
Or is it plain cowardice that i cower.
If ever there is an opportunity so kind,
I will not let it get away ever.

VI

I am hoping that there is way,
To make this wish of mine a reality.
Then i can promise i will not sway,
And having you a real reality.

0800 - 2000 hrs./sept. 13, 1995

funny as it may seem today but back then, i really don’t have any idea as to why i wrote this poem in the first place.

it was one of those office days that we don’t have anything to do, not that we don’t have anything to do but we were able to finished the assigned job way ahead of schedule. with nothing to do, i took piece of paper and a pen. could be some sense of hopeless romanticism in me, that wrote this poem. i started to write this poem at around 8am and was able to finished this until 8pm. the next day i had this printed and the poem itself is not that bad for a lot of my co-employees ask for a copy. damn! na unhan pa ko sa mga ukoy!

to whom this poem is dedicated? if you asked me then i would gave hazy answers but if you ask me now, i will give you a one sure fire confident answer.

i have said funny, because the poem has in some sort have a prophetic tone. it really fits the process that i have gone through just to end up with the woman in my dreams, my wife.

romantic isn’t it?

here’s the story:

first met my future wife back in march 1995, in a casual introduction. she’s still a college student then and i, a part-time college instructor at that time and still applying for a job. i wasn’t working for islacom at that time, islacom was took over by globe in 1999 and i was hire in may of 1995. that is stanza one of the poem.

i met my future wife again in late 1997 and in early 1998, the story unfolds and that fits the 2nd stanza up to the 6th stanza. the rest as they say is history. we tied the matrimonial knot in december 11, 1999. 

pagka romantic jud!

poetry01

Wild Swans - 01 - English Electric Lightning (Wild Swans)

eyeswhenever i close my eyes

i
i close my eyes and shut myself away,
and think of the things and events,
that happen to come my way, good or bad,
a lot of things that come into my mind,
which is one too many for me.

ii
i close my eyes and shut myself away,
and think of those people whom i’ve met.
some of whom points the blame on me,
for letting my ideas muddled theirs.
i’m only expressing and i didn’t say do it.

iii
when i close my eyes and isolate myself,
and think of my emotions inside me,
fear and anxiety, frustration and
confusion, anger and pain, all kept in me.
if i let it out, others might get hit or hurt.

iv
i have to close my eyes to see things,
bright and blurred, black and white,
both from negative and positive sides,
and why these things happen to me.
it really puts me in a confused situation.

v
closing my eyes and think of those things,
that made me suffer and cry in silence,
and to the extent of drafting my suicide,
and making it a reality to end this life,
but a tiny flicker of light stopped me.

vi
i close my eyes to see things,
that i’ve done in the past without regret,
and to be done today regardless of repercussions,
for the future without hesitation.
nothing can be done with the past only for the future.

vii
closing my eyes and looking around me,
i see humans with their insane sanity,
while living in uncivilized civilization,
just to fit the inhuman humanity,
we’ve done this just to conform.

viii
i close my eyes and see myself,
a person, a human of flesh and blood,
a person with a heart not of stone.
who’s trying to contain and control oneself,
while praying that i still have the guts to do it in the future.

ix
whenever i close my eyes…

(08-11-1993/0830hrs)

back 1993, this poem made lot of sense to me and still is today but not in the same manner as then. this was, believe it or not was intended as a suicide note but as i was halfway thru it, i felt a sense of release was taken of my chest. days if not weeks before this was written, a feeling of desperation, frustration, emptiness and desolation hounded me. how i ended with that feeling years ago, i really don’t know, even up to this day. and i never wanted to know, even if i had a few loose ideas as to what causes it.

now, as i read and re-post this once again(it was posted on my other web: www.swaki.multiply.com on 01-08-2008), all i could do is smile and take a deep breath. had i ended my life back then, i wouldn’t be able to see what we have today. just thankful that i kept in mind what my college instructor in technical english writing told us then: “write down whatever feeling you have felt, for it will not only gave a sense of relief but also a smile on your face whenever you read what you have written”. i simply did just that, and it’s true. thanks to my college instructor.

Recovered Post

it’s raining again. darn it!

how could my field crews accomplished their task, damn that rain!

why does it rain?

New Found Glory - 04 - It’s Not Your Fault (New Found Glory)

weekend activities

last saturday’s activity to carcar went on without a hitch. i got all the materials, well most of it. thank goodness.

sunday went by with not much activity, except for the usual things to be done.

for today, i can see some activities which is usual for the first day of the week.

now, to my hp music. i have loaded the rain and the wildswans plus rialto just add some spice to the list. have just cut down on rivermaya’s songs, yeah, yeah, too bad. hey, i need some space on my memory card okey!

have to edit some songs on my hp, damn! should have done this when i first loaded those songs. grrrrrr!

as for my field crews, they may not be the cream of the crop but certainly they are not the worst of the lot either. i just hate it when things go wrong especially they didn’t heed my instructions, it’s not that i kept them under my thumb i gave them a free reign on how to manage their respective turfs. besides, i wouldn’t gave them instructions that i myself would not do. it would be plain stupidity to do such things. like i said, not best but not worst too, maybe some prodding for them to do what was supposedly done. necessary kicks in the butt, as they say but not all the time.

a thought

just when you thought things were okay, suddenly takes a turn. why is that? i just don’t know. change could be the answer, be it for the worse or for the bettter.

life they say takes sudden changes, sometimes you thought that it was not what you wished for and it only makes you feeling down. i guess all of us experiences that way. how we surpassed it, depends on how we sees it.

back to my hp music, i think kid rock’s music is okey. i was thinking of doing again the rain and the wildswans after uploading the songs this morning. i like the beat and the melody and also i’m planning to cut down the rivermaya list. damn! what a waste! i like most of their songs on my hp. guess i’ll to make small sacrifices. toink! i still don’t know which song i’m going to cut from the list but rest assured some of bamboo’s got to go too. hmmm, small sacrifices eh?

well, have to do it sooner or later. i’ll make a list next time, so as not to consume much of my memory card on my hp.

naaaah, i’ll do it later anyway.

my other sites

Wild Swans - 01 - Liquid Mercury (Wild Swans)

The Rain - 11 - My Brilliant Friend (The Rain)

The Rain - 02 - Girl In Mind (The Rain)

The Rain - 07 - Perfect Moment (The Rain)

The Rain - 10 - More To Lose (The Rain)

http://swaki.multiply.com/

http://www.myspace.com/swaki

naghuna-huna pa ko sa uban.

he, he, he, he.

work, work, work and all about work!

just thinking about what’s going to happen when i get to carcar tomorrow. will the materials would be enough for the upcoming december event hosted by cebeco3. that remains to be seen. meanwhile, have to monitor my crews activity.

as for the music on my hp, just replaced slipknot by kid rock and a compilation of pinoi rock. preferably the ones that ones that barely made it to the music arena, plus a couple of christian/gospel music (the rock types).

been thinking about my wife and son tonight, they’re at their school doing a scouting school camp as a requisite for the district scouting camporal sometime this month. i wonder how my son would fare out there. damn, time flies so fast, it was like yesterday when i first met my son years ago at the nursery of the cebu community hospital, shivering to the cold airconditioning. he was just been cleaned by the nurses, he just arrived a few moments then. it would be a matter of time, when my daughter would do the same thing.

arrrg! hate to think about it! well, that’s how life is. go with the flow, but proceed to the destination and not to where the flow would take you. it’s just my mind, it feels so tired. it’s all in my head.

kafaet!!!!

lazy afternoon

08/26/2009-1550hrs:

just a hot afternoon, where in waiting for my field crews activity results.

damn! i hate this part! i’d be better off doing it but that’s how it goes nowadays. whew!

been thinking on changing the music on my hp. just finished loading slipknot and was contemplating on loading it with coal chamber. just a thought, too busy to do it!

China Drum - 01 - Can’t Stop These Things

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